Friday, May 20, 2005

Revenge of the Sith. My opinion here.

WARNING! SPOILERS!
DO NOT KEEP READING IF YOU HAVEN'T SEEN THE MOVIE YET (and plan to).

I was so excited, but "Star Wars: Revenge of the Sith" was a disappointment.
Saw it last night.


Ewan McGregor mugged and beamed. And kept referring to children as "younglings."

Samuel L. Jackson looked angry, briefly, then got the purple lightning treatment from Emperor Sinister, or whatever his ridiculous name was.
And the Emperor's face swells up like a hot marshmallow when he electrocutes people.

Natalie Portman's job was impossible. She's supposed to pretend to be deeply in love with the guy who spent five nice minutes with her on some prairie planet before he became intolerably moody and self-important and started his lightsaber massacre habit. Plus, he has the worst White Space Trash haircut in the galaxy.

The less said about his acting, the better.
Anakin was barely believable as a human being, let alone a tortured soul torn between duty and love.
I did enjoy seeing three of his limbs lopped off with a lightsaber.

There is, indeed, some lame and thinly-veiled Bush-bashing, but it's lost in the sea of awful acting.

Not even Yoda with a lightsaber could do the trick. In fact, Lucas Yoda-fied so much of his syntax that it sounded silly. He said things like "Beautiful day to fly a kite out . . . it is." Sigh.

There were wookies. Big deal.

In short: no drama, no tension, no emotion, heavy-handed, humorless, cool special effects, awful acting, writing, and directing.

At least I don't have to watch any more of them.

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